The last three days

Winslow AZ, to Gallup, NM 127 miles

Today, we had a very lame day. So lame in fact that by the end of it, the only thing I can compare it to was an episode of the hit 90's sitcom, Full House... long, dull and boring. The day started out at 7:30 with a family breakfast in the kitchen when dad and I compared this ride to building silos and painting houses while laughing hysterically. It's just the same thing over and over. After we left the hotel, we got on the interstate that we stayed on all day. The constant rumble of the traffic passing right by our faces was not unlike Bob Saget's pathetic and monotonous attempt at humor (remember "America's Funniest Home Videos?). Later on in the day, I made a few jokes to myself about Dad's hair, not unlike the whole cast ripping on Uncle Jesse for his constant obsession over how good his hair looks. Later on in the day I found myself imitating Jimmy's (you will find out who Jimmy is in a minute) voice not unlike the character of Joey Gladstone (who in a completely unrelated story I met one evening in Menomonie, WI, mere minutes before his leg was accidentaly used as a urinal in the facilities of a local watering hole...true story...seriously). All of this led up to a very lackluster climax of the episode that involved Dad getting a flat tire 20 miles before we got to our hotel. Anyway, it was 127 miles of interstate...not too fun. Hopefully this will be the last day of significant time spent on the interstate. We are staying at the Econo Lodge tonight, and it is quite ghetto. I will give them the benefit of the doubt that the towel I just used to wipe off my face used to be white. All in all it is a comfortable place, and we are happy we made it safe!



Yesterday, Cottonwood AZ, to Winslow, AZ 107 miles

Today was more along the lines of an episode of COPS. Nothing much happened all morning and into the afternoon. We had 55 tough miles of climbing to start the day, and then we had to get on the interstate in Flagstaff. We had 25-35 mph side winds that at some points were hitting us square in the back helping us along. Once we got 25 miles outside of Winslow, that's when it all started to unfold. There was traffic backed up for about 10 miles. We cruised past the stand-still traffic up to a road block in the middle of the interstate. We talked to the road block dude for a minute, and he told us there was a huge accident up ahead, but we could go through. Three miles up the road, that is when we met Jimmy. Jimmy is no older than I am, and he works as a highway patrol officer for the state of Arizona (we learned his name from the desk manager at our hotel who just so happened to know him). Although completely unneccessary, he felt the need to turn on his sirens right behind me after I was already half stopped. He got out of his car, and in his best I-was-under-constant-ridicule-in-highschool-and-that-is-why-I-became-a-cop-voice, said "didn't you see the road block back there?" I gave this a lot of thought over the past 24 hours, and I still can't quite figure out whether or not that was supposed to be a rhetorical question. Anyway, I answered it. I said in a very pleasant tone, "we sure did, but the road block guy said we could go through." Next, in his best I-barely-made-the-football-team-in-highschool-and-I-was-the-only-guy-on-the-team-that-had-a-clean-jersey-running-off-the-field-at-the-end-of-a-muddy-rain-game-voice said, "well there is a accident up ahead that involved five commercial vehicles, one of which was carrying hazardous materials and it might blow up." So, I came back with a very nice, "well can we just wait here?" Next in his best I-act-really-tough-but-secretly-I-am-just-angry-that-I-am-a-cop-and-can't-grow-a-moustache-voice said, "well you can go up two miles to exit 139, but if you go any further, I will have my guys arrest you for disobeying a police officer." We said that would be fine, and took off for the exit. We went under the overpass once we got to the exit, and about five minutes later, we see Robocop flying by doing about 80 miles an hour with his lights and sirens on in full force. If I were a gambling man, I would think a good wager would be to bet that he was listening to AC/DC at full volume staring at himself in the rearview mirror. Ok, if you can't tell, I was rather upset with the way he handled the situation last night, but now I can laugh about it.

Ok, fast forward two hours. We are standing at the abandoned tourist trap that Jimmy made us stay at. There was seriously nothing around, and we were freezing cold by this point. Dad decided it would be a good idea to go knock on the door of what looked like an uninhabited trailer house. He was out of my sight for only about 30 seconds as I gave it my best shot to protect myself from the wind. I looked back around the corner to see Dad nowhere in sight. After he did not return for a good five minutes, I was starting to think Buffalo Bill opened the door, billy-clubbed him over the head, and dragged him inside. All I could think of was, "It puts the lotion on the skin, or it gets the hose again." Well he came back after a while, and the people that actually lived in the trailer said we could sit in a broken down van outside their house. We hung out in there until about 6:45. We finally saw west bound traffic coming down the interstate, so we assumed that nothing was in jeopardy of blowing up anymore, and decided to go for it. About three miles up the road is when we came to the accident site where there were about 100 or so vehicles stopped right behind it. We talked to some bikers, and they said they were there for six hours. Ouch. Well, to wrap up this very long story, the nicer cop up front (with a full moustache) let us walk around the accident and ride the last 14 miles in the dark to our hotel. There was a wedding block right next to our room. That was no fun from 3:00am to about 4:30. Enough about yesterday.

Two days ago, Wickenburg, AZ to Cottonwood, AZ 100ish miles

Mark this day on your calendar, folks. Take next year off work, drop the kids off at a babysitter and get ready to celebrate. I never thought this day would ever come. It was the first time in my 25 years on this planet that dad admitted he was sick. I know, right? As Dave Barry would say, "I am not making this up." We had tough climbs all day, and dad could not make it up the last of three very significant ones. That is when Whitney picked him up and and hauled him 20 miles into Cottonwood. I finished the day solo. That last climb about killed me, so it would have done dad in. When I got to the top 5 miles after dad got picked up, I had a 15 mile descent into Cottonwood. I made it in record time. Mom...DO NOT read the next sentence. Mom, why are you still reading this...you're not supposed to...ok, DO NOT read the next sentence. I passed a motorcycle at one point doing about 50 mph. It was really fun, and I am glad dad wasn't with me, or I would have freaked him out. Well, I made it to town safe, and I waited for dad outside the Super 8 for him to get back from his hose-job at the urgent care place. We ate a nice dinner across the street, and went to bed. Pretty uneventful day.

Alright, I am tired of typing, and we are going to Taco Bell... goodnight.

Blake

P.S. It's day eight on the beard, and she's starting to get pretty trashy...